take it back now
Imagine it being a long time ago. Like, really really long. Like when mom and dad were still kinda normal and together and- er, anyways. Before the Big Bad happened. Imagine being born and your parents were really excited and happy. And things were pretty dang cool, and you were gonna go to normal little girl school and- and then it happened. And everything was lost, especially mom.
Who's that? He's got a beard, and he looks a little blue- but he's really nice. Simon, he says. You were glad someone had come for you. Everyone else was gone and Simon was so nice. And he protected you from all the new bad things in the world- why did he have to put that thing on...and ruin himself? To keep you safe, he'd always say...
Fast forward a lil. Simon's...gone. But he taught you so much, and now you think you're gonna be all right. The world has changed a lot in the last few centuries. Now you do something else with your time- and that's hunt vampires. The Vampire King's had it too good, for too long. So, you take down his whole court, gettin' all their cool vampire powers, and now it's time for the showdown with that bloodthirsty monarch. You beat him- of course, he was a chump -but that punk bit you right on the neck! And now, you're a vampire too- the last vampire.
At some point you stopped protecting the humans, because they're kinda lame. It's a lot more fun to be a villain! Playing wicked tunes on your bass, terrorizing these silly chumps that call the world Ooo. Yeah, that's what it goes by now. Weird. And what's that with your demon dad? Finally back, and he wants you to rule the Nightosphere...whatever that is. Some demon realm for demons. Buzz off, dad, you tell him. He's banished and stuff now. But another fool's back around, this one with a beard and blue skin. You know him well. But he's entirely different now. Completely gone and lost. He's annoying, but...he's your friend. Even if he's nuts. You can't forget what he means to you.
We're gettin' to the here and now real fast, yo. Being a vampire is working out pretty well for you, even if sunshine is, like, poisonous. Or is it like fire? You've just been traveling around the land of Ooo, playing hilarious pranks on chumps. Humans are pretty much gone-zo...except for that one, Finn. He's fun to mess with, but him and his dog are good friends, even if they're goody-two-shoes. Bonnibel's there too. You go way back with the gumdrop gal, and things were whack for a while, but you think it's gonna be alright. Even Dad is back- maybe you can make up with him after all this time.
That said, things are...changing for you. You used to be about pulling people's legs and being the dark and dangerous vampire queen, stalking the night and making people scream...but those two, Finn and Jake, and Bonny, they're good, and even if they're not perfect, they're your friends. And you start wanting to be good like them, wanted like them, because they've proven that they like you despite all your flaws. It's a good feeling. You've started looking at the things you do, the way you are, from the third person, like a ghost floating above it all- and you think a change might be pretty great.
So suddenly, you don't wanna be a vampire anymore. Bonny's got a cure...but you didn't think about it, and now the Vampire King's back! It wasn't too hard to beat him and his court for the second time in a row, but in the end, you just got bitten again...but you learned a lot because of all that. Maybe this is your destiny. A life forever in the land of Ooo, hanging out with Bonny and Simon (sort of), and Finn and Jake and-